For most people, this title means nothing. For others, they would decry it decidedly not on the maps of myths.
For me…
A few nights ago, I remembered this blog for the first time in a long while. I read some of the old posts, marveling at how indulgent I sounded, how I was primarily moored in the mundanity of the events of my early forties, and how I really did try for wisdom amidst the mediocrity.
I really did try.
So I spent maybe five minutes reading a couple of posts, then I noticed the time was getting late and so I got up to go to bed. I walked a few steps, and stopped. In that moment I experienced a vivid flash of memory: I was hanging out with my family in the summer of 2011. I got up and said something like, “I need to make a post on my blog by this evening.” I don’t know what arbitrary deadline I had set for myself—perhaps I had promised my handful of readers (most of whom were in the room with me at that moment) I would post again soon. But off I went, with a sense of importance and excitement.
Anyway, as I stood in the present, remembering this, I started to tear up. Who did I think I was? Christ, I was in my early forties. How embarrassing. Couldn’t I see how immature and self-important I was being about a silly blog that no one really read?
Then I took another step and I immediately stopped my maudlin nonsense. After all, bedtime and my middle aged nightly beauty routine were beseeching me to walk with them for a pleasant night’s sleep.
Since then, an idea keeps returning to my mind. Why DID I tell stories of the Map of Myths? For an inflated sense of self-importance? For people to praise my writing? Or because it was nonsensical fun?
I think, in all honesty, it was all three. And I also think—more so than I ever allowed myself to think when I was younger—that you don’t have to be important or praiseworthy, or even pleasing—if you lean into the nonsensical fun.
So, I am tossing this into a void with no expectation for it ever to be read or any wisdom to be gleaned: I think I want to have fun again. See you soon.
Map of Myths 
YAY!!! NEW BLOG POST!!! I love it. Thanks for writing. I think you don’t give yourself quite as much credit as I’d like you to. I have always loved your writing voice. I think it is thoughtful, intelligent, inventive. I like that we get to see a bit more of your serious side. And of course I love the nonsensical fun as well, if that’s what you decide to lean into. You’re a good writer and I’m happy to go wherever you decide to take us (if you want).
Related to what you are posting, I actually went through something a bit similar recently. I took a look at my theater blog for the first time in years a few weeks ago (I wanted to see if I had ever written anything on the blog about Sunset, and it turns out I had, and that fact made me happy, and even better I still agreed with basically everything I had said about it). Now, I don’t really plan on restarting my own blog because it drained me too much (and I was definitely way out of my depth on some of the shows I wrote about), but I’m glad I tried to articulate and share my thoughts for a while and I think you should be glad too. I just looked at your post on losing dad, for example, and found it incredibly meaningful. I found a lot of wisdom there.
Anyway if you decide to keep posting I’ll be delighted to read more!